Belongingness

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We met at the assemblage.
And I try to reconcile the moments;
With a lump in my throat,
And a teary-eyed face..
With the shattered pieces of the heart,
And keeping everyone apart..
I take out the crushed note from my back pocket.
Which said, ‘I love you’
To which I undoubtedly trusted. 
It was safe with me, the note I received from you long time back..
I sit alone and brood
In the audacity to succumb to the love..
And remember..

“Your comely personality,
And your enchanting voice..
You were this guy,
Focused on his denouement..
And maybe I was this girl,
Who came to break your resolutions,
Time was slutty, but at the same time sluggish..
How easily it passed when I was with you,
And how difficult, when we weren’t together.”
I sat in complete languor
“You were the other moiety I lost at that time,
It was like, we reunited,
How we created a panoply.
Your redolence was still the same,
You didn’t change a bit.
The smirk stayed on till you came near to me..
I was looking for serendipity and found one.. right here, in your smile which endowed your face,
You kiss away my tears,
And protect my fears.”

You whispered to me, “I came to stay”
And I took my steps back..
To you it was an untoward move,
for me it was a righteous one.
I never wanted your ghastly absence to kill me, after you’ve tried to stay with me once and left..
I don’t want that time to come back,
I keep taking my steps back..
Tracing reality and taming my senses.
I move back and run away..
Away from everyone, as I was already.
I came back to my real place.. I belonged to myself first before I am anyone else’s.
Wafture, and now I smile..
I left you before you could kill me once again.
I left in a vestigial, so you could get me back. How I started longing for you again..
Maybe my feelings won’t die, till..
I breathe my last.
This is my surreptitious nature,
You won’t ever understand and that’s why I belong to myself.

-Prakriti Chaprana

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3 thoughts on “Belongingness

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